The Gingivitis Kiss

After three years he [insert nickname here] finally got it right and called me a week in advance to see if I would like to join him for dinner when he's in town. He asked if this was enough time to get a babysitter and I told him "Definitely".

I'm so excited! Someone is taking me out… I don't have to pay! Wow! I couldn't tell you the last time I was taken out to dinner by anyone, except my parents. Don't get me wrong I'm not out to get a free meal… it's just the chivalry thing is such a turn on.

Mini recap on some recent dates:
Croatian Boy: Line "See I have big hands", and on his last chance date I had to pay for the movie and my dinner was popcorn, that I paid for, because he wasn't hungry.
Boat Boy: Looks like a monkey, walks like a bulldog. Big muscles, nice body but he is the high school football player that never made it big and he is still playing that football card and it's 20 years later. He is in search of a sugar momma that will give him everything including a ton of attention.

I couldn't remember what he [insert nickname here] looks like. Can't be that bad or I would have remembered from the first time we met. We bump into each other on site and I search his face trying to recognize him but I think I must have blanked him out. I'm a little worried but I know that personality is the most important thing. I'm not considering dinner to be a date but I'm not sure after our rendezvous at work and the way he looked at me.

We meet for a drink and decide to head down the street for a seafood dinner. He said he wanted seafood and I told him we could go to the Chart House, which is on the water, or the Fish Market, a little less expensive. He says, "Whichever is more romantic". So at this point I guess this IS a date and a first date at that and he is talking romance? Hmm I'm not sure if he is kidding or not… I don't think he is.

We go to The Chart House and they sit us in a very romantic spot next to a fire with a great view of the water. This is making me a bit uneasy so I become Chatty Cathy. I apologize for it as he compliments my eyes and tells me he's enjoying learning more about me. Eeewwww! I think this isn't going so well for me but I will give him the benefit of the doubt. I was talking about a movie I had seen recently, "The 40 Year Old Virgin". With this he says, "Well I'm a 39 year old virgin". OMG! I don't think he is kidding on this one either. I don't know what to say to this except "I was wondering how old you are?"

As we head back he asks to hold my hand… sure why not? He held on for dear life and I lost some feeling in my fingers. It must have looked like two pre-teens walking down the street holding hands looking very awkward and uncomfortable. He walks me to my car, which I love showing off. As I turn around he is right there and he plants a huge wet juicy kiss on me and here comes the tongue. It becomes a tongue war to keep his out of my mouth. He backs off for a breath and a huge piece of slobber is keeping us attached. So he comes back at me to reclaim his slobber, which I will gladly give back but it turns into another tongue war. Whew, he finally backs off; maybe my pushing him away gave him a hint. I pointed him in the direction of the elevator and hopped in the car for my escape. Oye! I feel nosh! That was disgusting!

You must be saying how stupid I am. With all my bad dates why am I not recognizing this as going bad, downhill, a big POOP! I don't understand it myself. When I think back through the date it is plain as the nose on my face but while in it I guess I keep thinking, "Come on dude! You Can Do IT!"