I mean really…. What are they thinking?

I’m talking about men.

Last December I met a guy as my Match subscription expired… Croatian Boy!

We went out here and there and he would stop by work to see me and that was nice. BUT we never had a real date and there were some odd things, e.g. he would not look at me and he was always looking all around. He said it was a habit from when he was younger when he had to always keep an eye out. Yeah... I don’t know either.

I figured no one was perfect but then it really bothered me when he showed up to see me and I swear he smelled like pussy. Did this dude just have sex with some chick then come see me? Well I backed off and told him this wasn't working but he was able to get back in my good graces and asked for one more chance. I told him he had to take me on a real date and we made a date for the next Friday.

That week he started complaining of a sore throat and not feeling well and it seemed he didn’t want to do much to take care of himself or to even feel better in time for our date. It was as if he was building this up for some excuse. That was nothing compared to what happened that Thursday. My new car, of less than three weeks, was rear-ended. I LOVE this car and I was devastated. I told him, flat out, that I needed to have a good night on our date.

The next day I had to take the car to a body shop and I got a nasty smelling rental. I was not a happy camper but I was looking forward to my date. By the time he showed up at my place I was starving, but the first thing he told me was that he wasn’t hungry. So we headed out to the movie that I had already seen but he was set on seeing this movie. I had coupons for the theater and as we got up to the register he never pulled out his wallet so I paid. At least I had coupons. At this point I was irritated and my back was starting to feel bad, due to the accident.

I went to get myself some popcorn and as I was paying he walked up and said, “I have four dollars if you need it.”

"Ummmm No!"

We had plans to spend the next day together but I suggested we cancel because he had been feeling bad. This worked for him and I’m sure he felt fine but had other plans. I just wanted to get away from him.

I was so irritated I couldn't get a real date from someone I had been seeing. My retaliation was a bit juvenile, but I was irritated at the stupidity of men, especially, this one. He wanted me pass out his business cards since he was new to mortgage sales. I took the cards I had and wrote LIAR and SELFISH in big black marker and mailed them back to him.

So tonight Mini Red and I are watching Nanny McPhee and I got a text message;

“Hey Girl. How have u been? I was just thinking about ya.”

I text back: “Who is this”, but I had a good idea who it was.

Croatian Boy: “The guy who lives in old town. The one who screwed up. Remember now?”

Red: “Thought so. Yeah you did screw up.”

Croatian Boy: “I know. I am a dumbass. So how are you? Still work near me?”

Red: “You were awful to me at a very bad time. Plus you smelled like pussy once when you came to see me at work.”

Croatian Boy: Pussy? How does that smell? I was not with anyone else. That I promise you. And I know I was an ass when u needed me. I am sorry. And how does pussy smell?

Red: Like you just had sex! Why are you contacting me? Sex?

Croatian Boy: I didn’t just have sex. I swear. And no this is no booty call. I don’t think you are that way. I wanted 2 say hello. And sorry.

I’m not going to even bother to continue this conversation. Actually, I was surprised he sent another text after I said he smelled like pussy/sex.

What cojones?