A Saturday Night Out

It was Saturday night and my brother suggested I join him and his wife and their friends in Bethesda. I figured why not I really need to get out and maybe meet new people.

They were already there when I arrived. I knew most of the group but there was still that awkwardness. I was introduced to those I didn’t know and Brotha-Man told me BN, my sister’s friend, was bartending at the back bar. I excused myself and went to say hello.

BN is the equivalent to our fourth sibling, and she is the only one who has ever climbed into bed with our parents, except of course for the cats. We made idle chit chat and I asked her about the dude she’s been seeing. She is sickeningly giddy at just the thought of him and tells me she is in love. I so happy for her and glad to hear it since it’s been evident to everyone else for some time now.

I’m told my sister, and her boyfriend, have left his party to go to Cleveland Park to some obscure bar. My sister is becoming known for the new and obscure bars she and her boyfriend visit. We are hoping they meet up with us but they never do… At least while I am there.

So BN hooks me up and asks me to try and get the group to the back bar. Ahhhh the beer tastes good… this is just what I’ve been needing. We all, eventually, move to the back bar and Brotha-Man is getting shots for his friends and they are getting crazy. My Sister-In-Law (SIL) and I are just watching as they get crazy and the bar gets more and more packed.

One of the guys, I hadn’t met before, was drinking energy drinks with vodka and the occasional shot. Every time he talked he spit and this seems to get worse with every drink he has. I could barely contain myself when SIL, blatantly, wiped at a big spittle that hit her face. She then made a very astute observation… this guy reminded her of a young Rodney Dangerfield. Damn if she didn’t hit the nail on the head. Every time he thought he was being really funny or really enjoying a story he was telling his eyes would bug out. So lets put this all together and maybe you can get this fabulous visual. Imagine a guy who is very hyper, thinks he’s hilarious, bugs his eyes out, spits as he speaks then starts dancing around. Oh I almost forgot when he complimented my hair and kissed my hand. SIL seemed to enjoy it so I just kinda wiped my hand on her. We tried our best to keep away especially after he puked. I heard he got sick a few more times after I left. Glad I missed that.

I look up because someone just threw ice at me and I realize it’s BN and she’s holding up a beer for me. I gotta be careful cause I could get drunk this way and I decide I might need to stay out of her line of sight. This is no problem since the place is getting more and more packed. BN knows most of the people there and I see ice flying across the room when she wants to get someone’s attention.

I’m feeling so old because everyone in the place is at least ten years younger than me but they are definitely fun to watch and I think SIL is enjoying it too. We notice this one dude with and interesting necklace and SIL says, “Nothing says I want your number better than poison darts hanging from your neck.” The music is getting louder and we notice the, ever common, “Air Maracas” dance going on around us.

I’ve stopped drinking because if I didn’t I would have to call the cab company and say, “Find the Mad Cabbie cause Red needs ride home”. So as I have stopped they are getting more and more drunk. Sometimes it’s fun to watch when your sober but I’m getting hungry since I ate a late lunch and no dinner. I’m seriously debating walking over to Tastee Diner.

In the end I left and went home to fix myself a wrap with mayo, lettuce, tomato and fried egg. It was awesome not-to-mention much less expensive. Actually, it was an inexpensive evening all around for me. I kinda like it that way